I Am the Worst Consumer Ever

I finally broke down, entered the 21st century, and bought myself an MP3 player today.

The MP3 player I selected was an iPod Nano. A pretty blue one.

I'd like to tell you that this choice was made after days--or at least minutes--of careful market research, and that I made my purchase as a rational, well-informed consumer, but in fact I bought it because it looks neat and it's what all the cool kids have.

All of this in spite of the fact that I have a sketchy history with Apple products--I bought an iMac several years ago and it wasn't precisely everything I had hoped it would be--and furthermore the iPod Nano lacks a feature I have long insisted is key for any MP3 player (a dedicated volume knob).

But it's pretty. And blue.

I even bought my Nano at Costco, which is probably the least Apple-like way to acquire an Apple product yet devised by human civilization. (But hey, I saved ten bucks).

So why did I do it? Because I looked at the other MP3 players on the shelf at Best Buy the other day and they all looked BO-RING. Because the Nano is shiny and slick looking and makes me feel like Buck Rogers. Because Apple's propaganda is so awesomely powerful (iPod is to MP3 player as Kleenex is to tissue) that no one as weak-willed as I could resist.

This is why the free market doesn't work as advertised, people!

Okay, I gotta go play with my iPod now...